can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
