You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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