highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
