i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
