Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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