my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
It's no shave November. This is our time.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Randomize
