If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
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