ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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