So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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