lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
ttyl tear gas
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Randomize