No, you can still breathe under the balls.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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