Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
