actually, I'm a sock model
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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