You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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