i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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