Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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