You smell like stripper and shame
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
