they need to just BURY HIM!
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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