Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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