she was so not down for the gang bang
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
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