id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize
