my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
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Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
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I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
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