I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
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