i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.