they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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