It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
