Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
We left the knife in your bed.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
