My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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