That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Buhtt sex?
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
