Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Randomize
