Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
even my farts smell like vagina
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
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