I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize