WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
