Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
