3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
