Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Randomize
