Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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