Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
this hospital has no fireball
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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