dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
40s are totally the cure
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Randomize
