Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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