doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Your face is a jimmy john
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
