North Korea, Best Korea!
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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