ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
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