look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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