I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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