some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
