I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
