I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Randomize
