He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
so let's talk penis.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Randomize
