just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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