YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Randomize