go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
